Languages of Loss
Languages of Loss is a ‘conversation’ between Sasha’s grieving self and her therapist self. It reflects her search to find ways to express the inexpressible and make sense of the nonsensical. She explores various grief theories and looks at what different psychotherapeutic approaches have to offer in this quest for ways to manage the seemingly unbearable pain of loss. Along the way she shares her own pain, despair, confusion and rage, trying to see these feelings through a psychotherapeutic lens.
Why buy the book?
Grief is an inevitability for everyone, bereavement the one thing no one can avoid. And yet we still don’t talk about it enough. Despite conversation about our state of mind becoming more and more prevalent, grief is often viewed as an untouchable mountaintop that one must overcome alone. This book normalises what can feel abnormal. It breaks down taboos about death and tries to find humour and light amidst the depressing, confusing reality. It is an essential companion to help support readers through the agony of those early months, giving permission for all the feelings, and offering various methods of dealing with them, including chapters on your changing sense of self, what effect it may or may not have on any existing or emerging spirituality or world view, and how best to make use of the endless offers of help from friends and community. It will help you understand the myriad grief theories, coming to recognise when to lean on, and when to discard them; it explores some therapeutic approaches which may help explain your various ways of reacting, and will support you in trying to find that balance of keeping your loved ones’ memories and presence alive and with you, while simultaneously exploring new ways of being without them. The book is divided into seven sections reflecting Sasha’s own stages – which she prefers to call shapes as they are not linear – implosion, scattering, flailing, floating, balancing, sailing, swimming.
The overriding message is that everyone’s experience of grief is different but knowing more about the theory, learning your own new languages of loss, may not ease the grief but will help you feel less alone, and at some point enable you to reflect back and see how far you have come.
And if none of that convinces you, maybe this will – the forward is written by wonderful actor and human being, Tamsin Greig, one of Bill’s oldest and closest friends. Tamsin is also the magnificent narrator of the audiobook which is available on Audible.